Another significant difference between men and women that I have recently had the opportunity to observe up close and personal is the process whereby each gender goes about resolving friendship issues.
As I am a process-geek Rhino I've decided to capture the process steps for your edification.
MALE process steps for resolving friendship issues:
Process Duration - 5 minutes
1. Man tells friend that he is acting like a total dick-head and he needs to stop or a can of whoop ass will be opened.
2. Friend replies that he didn't realize that he was acting like a dick-head and said behavior will cease and desist immediately.
3. Fists are bumped. Beer is quaffed. Equilibrium is restored.
FEMALE process steps for resolving friendship issues:
Process Duration: 90 - 120 Days
1. Discuss with several girlfriends, in excruciating detail, the emotional distress associated with needing to end possibly, maybe a friendship with someone because you don't agree with their behavior, morals, they are a bitch, etc., etc.
2. Discuss with their husband, in excruciating detail, the emotional distress associated with needing to end, possibly, maybe, a friendship with someone because you don't agree with their behavior, morals, they are a bitch, etc., etc.
3. In order to justify the decision the woman now lists all of the good things and bad things about the person to see if the bad outweighs the good - even if the bad is so bad that you couldn't possibly like yourself if you had to be around it and no amount of good could possibly absolve it. Share this list with the husband and review each and every item on the list ad nauseum, sometimes acting as devil's advocate, to make sure that all list items have been sufficiently discussed.
4. Decides to end the friendship but take no action for a couple of weeks while rehashing steps 1, 2 and 3 to see if there is any way to salvage the relationship or to see if the other person's disagreeable behavior might magically abate thereby making the need to take action moot.
5. Ignore husband's advice to just have a conversation with the soon to be ex-friend and just get it over with.
6. Consult your friend the psychic to see if there is anything in the soon to be ex-friend's aura or past life that could be causing the current issues. Rehash conversation, at length, with husband.
7. Make the decision to end the friendship. Now that decision to break-off the friendship has been reached it is now time to obsess about the possibly hurt feelings of the soon to be ex-friend. Discuss pending guilty feelings incessantly with husband.
8. Get past the obsession about the soon to be ex-friend's feelings and obsess about possible retribution that the ex-friend might exact - however faint and implausible the hypothetical retribution may be. Discuss fears incessantly with husband.
9. Letting the fear of possible retribution keep you from taking action you once again seek out the advice of the psychic friend. On the advice of said psychic friend, you write the name of the soon to be ex-friend on a sheet of paper and place it in the freezer so as to metaphysically freeze them out with the intent that this "spell work" will cause the soon to be ex-friend to gradually fade, painlessly, away.
10. Over a period of weeks politely decline invitations from the soon to be ex-friend but still have hour(s) long conversations and/or exchange multiple text messages daily.
11. Gradually shorten conversations and then stop returning calls/messages and ignore texts.
12. After a couple of weeks of silence advise the husband that the "spell work" of freezing the name was successful and that the friendship has been ended successfully and painlessly. Do not acknowledge that the passive-aggressive act of reducing contact over time had any effect on the outcome.
Please note that you did not see the acronym HLDW* anywhere in the above.
Didn't think so.
The Rhino's objective and scientific conclusion: Bitches be crazy.
*Hippie Liberal Douche Wife