Saturday, October 08, 2011

The Dragonfly Apocalypse Begins

At the beach for the last few days. While having my morning tea and cigar on the balcony overlooking the surf this morning I had a visitor. A very large dragonfly landed on my leg and just sat there. I put my finger near its front legs to see what it would do ... And it reached out with its two front legs and rested them on my thumb. Cheeky little bastard, not intimidated in the least. Game on little dragonfly - let's see who gives in first.

Sat that way for awhile so I decided to up the ante and reached out and patted his head with my index finger - figuring that would get him to fly away. Nope. Little guy just smiled at me with that idiot dragonfly grin. Alrighty then, what next? The wings. Reached out and started stroking his wings. No reaction and I think the little bastard enjoyed it. His tail might have wagged once or twice. I couldn't decide if this was the bravest or most idiotic dragonfly in existence.

It was a beautiful experience and it ended in the only way that it could - with him squashed under my sandal. I couldn't let that little bastard get back to the main swarm and report in that he landed on The Rhino and that said Rhino was all soft and and cuddly and merciful. No, all that would do is send a signal to the rapacious dragonfly hordes that the rest of the human race was ripe for the plucking. Saving the human race before I finished my tea and cigar - it is no wonder that I'm a literary action hero (plug: pre-order Angels of Vengeance by John Birmingham on Amazon for my next adventure).

It is good to be the beach-combing, saving the world before breakfast Rhino.

HASTY EDIT: the HLDW* just read this and threatened to comment and tell the truth. I didn't squash the little idiot. We just sat there for 20 more minutes after I petted him some more and he flew off. Probably getting ready to lead the invasion as we speak. You guys are fucked ... I'm obviously beloved of the dragonflies and will be crowned the new king.

*Hippie Liberal Douche Wife

8 comments:

  1. ROFL....damn Rog...missed ya buddy. How do you know that the dragonfly isn't going back to his buddies to tell them "okay dudes...I located our next meal. Damn what a sucker!"

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  2. Yo, Wolfie - thanks for missing me and for stopping back.

    Mayhem - appreciate it! You really should have seen it. Crazy. It was like it was tame or something. I think I need to name it.

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  3. YAY The Rhino has posted, abeit in a softy touchy feeling frotaging the insects kinda way, but good to read you again.

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  4. Are you sure you're not the reincarnated DaliLama or something?

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  5. This may help,
    http://io9.com/5855419/stress-can-literally-kill-dragonflies

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  6. Hughesy said: "Are you sure you're not the reincarnated DaliLama or something?"

    Right.... like the Dali Lama fondles insects, gets busy with them, whatever, it was disgusting. If I had seen that happening at the very least I would have shouted "Hey! Get a room!"

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  7. Hey, dude - gonna make it up to KC?

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Comments are welcome. However, being an ass may result in a horrible, albeit accidental, goring.